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As I shared in this post, one of the gossips about me that sent me to a turmoil was the gossip that questioned my Christianity.
They said I am not a Christian enough,
As if my Christianity was up for measurement,
As if the relationship that is so sacred is out for show,
As if there are standards to measure my heart posture that I haven’t met yet.
When there are so many people united for a cause, I am sure it is easy for some to be the goal and a standard, and when you don’t act as them or be so, you miss the mark. This is more work based than what Christianity is, and so you get measured by your works than your faith (which of course is your business with the Lord). You see, this is the reason hata makanisani we still think walimu, waimbaji and etc ndio waKristo wazuri zaidi, na ndio maana waki”fall” we get shocked and disappointed because we did set them as a standard, while in reality hata mfagia kanisa ni Mkristo mzuri, hata anayekuja kanisani tu bila kuwa na activity/work yoyote ya kuprove uKristo wake ni mKristo mzuri pia.
We sometimes forget that Christ said follow me, not Peter and Anna. But you know what, tunatakiwa kuabudu na ndugu zetu, na kushiriki pamoja na kuwa kitu kimoja in Christ. But I feel like most of the times we forget our uniqueness, I don’t support sin, I support our uniqueness in the way we were created, in the way we think, how unique we are, even though most of it is affected by the culture but as Christians who are chosen and having our identities in Jesus Christ, we are to impact the world, impact our cultures.. Now that’s a topic for another day.
But Today, let me explain, let me tell you why I am your sister in Christ even though you think I don’t “fit in”, today let me tell you why I represent Christ too, and He gets the glory every day from the way He made me, today, let me tell you why I am a Christian enough.
–I grow in His grace and love every day
While you think I don’t belong, He actually thinks I do, and so He pursues me daily, and I seek His presence. He leads me with grace, mercy and His love. I grow daily in my relationship with Him. If that’s not being a Christian, I don’t know what is?
–I follow His lead and every day I learn to surrender to Him as my Lord
Am pretty sure I am His sheep, I hear His voice. And even though I don’t all the time obey, I am always trying to follow His lead, am not saying am good at it, but every day I want to get better. You know what I find myself fascinated by a story ya yule aliyemkubali Yesu pale msalabani. He didn’t even live like a Christian ila by the fact of accepting Jesus pale msalabani and having faith in Him, already alikuwa accepted in the family. I, most of the times I feel like him.
–I am being changed and redeemed daily
As much as you think that the moment I received Christ I adopt everything Christian- oriented, the truth is God is changing me daily. Ukweli ndio huu. Nilibadilishwa, nabadilishwa na nitaendelea kubadilishwa kila siku.. Ninaposoma Neno lake, ninapo kuwa ndani yake, ninapofunga, ninapoomba, ninapopitia mambo mbalimbali katika maisha. Kila siku naendelea kukua ndani yake.
–Nimekubalika na ninapendwa na Yesu
Kama yule mwizi pale msalabani, all that matters is nimekubalika na ninapendwa na Yesu. Sometimes tunawajudge watu waliotofauti na sisi, sometimes tunawaangalia hata watu wa madhehebu mengine kama vile wao wanaamini uongo, ama hawako sawa, ama hawako vizuri na Mungu ama Yesu walienaye sie.. Ama muda mwingine tunaona dhehebu letu ndio bora kuliko la kwao, tell you what, honestly we are to love God and love our neighbors.. And that’s all that matters. If you love your neighbor you won’t judge them, if you love God, you will want to please Him always.
–Natakaswa na kusamehewa kila siku
I am a Christian enough because Christ died for me, I am a Christian enough because I am forgiven daily, I am sanctified daily, and the power of the Holy Spirit convicts me to live a Holy life. I am a Christian enough because I want to know Him more and I seek Him. I am a Christian enough because I realized that, me without Him, I am sinful. I need Christ in me every year, month, week, day, and hour, minute and second. I, without Christ equals disaster, I am a Christian enough because I understand my reliance in Him.
As much as I wrote this post, as a response of the gossip and as an assurance to my identity in Christ, this post goes to all those who question if they are good Christians, or even measuring up. You are never too far gone, and there is grace in Christ to always meet you wherever you are, just like that thief on the cross.